Confessions of a shopaholic

The other day I fell in love with a scarf. It just so happens it was on sale for 60% off. I mean that should have been end of story right? It's from a store I haven't shopped in yearsssssss. Amazon prime has ruined me and I pretty much refuse to pay shipping. I had to spend $75 for free shipping and I really wasn't feeling anything else. I'm not above ordering and returning but this store is only in Crossgates and that ain't happening. I have my limits small as they may be. So I let it sit in my cart. Sometimes that's enough, I almost feel like I actually bought it, ya know? I go on with my life and never think about it again. But not this time. I remembered. I wanted it. I needed it. And I finally decided screw it I love it enough to pay shipping. That's true love my friends. So I head back on over and those terrifying words appeared. *sold out.* Noooooooo.

You either get it or ya don't. But if you do, you know it's real. Retail regret. I think fewer than 5 times in my life I've missed out on something that I've really gone back and been like shit I wish I bought that. Like the yellow and cobalt silk top at marshalls over 10 years ago. Seriously. If you're still reading you get it right? In the past I was forced to search eBay but now with poshmark growing by the second I've got a new resource on my side. But it was nowhere to be found. I searched everyday. Waiting it to pop up because that's the world we live in. Everything is available if you search hard enough right? If I can't find something on the internet does it really even exist? I do not forget what it was like before this. Where social media was so not a thing yet that I had to wait till the following weekend to get on my *actual* computer to check for Albany alive to post the pictures to their *actual* website from the weekend before to catch my boyfriend cheating on me at sneaky petes. Mhmm. I mean hypothetically that's what would have happened. Mhmm.

Anyways, I was trying to grieve the loss of this beautiful scarf when my friend posted a pic of herself in it and it was physically painful. It brought me back to my search again and wouldn't ya know it was back. In all its full priced glory. You better believe I added that sucker to cart. I've never been happier to pay full price because I knew we were in this for the long haul. Along with some other random shit to get me to $75 and of course I signed up for their damn rewards program tom because god forbid I ever end up in this predicament again. No worries though, it's on it's way to me and I've been retaught a lesson in retail therapy.

700 smiles 6 month update

Sooooo I've been meaning to do an update on our journey to 700 but ya know, life? Anyways this is honestly pretty incredible so I'm not even going to pretend it's not. 700 smiles started as an idea in my head somewhere either at the end of last year or at the beginning of this one. Who knows. I like things to make sense and fit in neat little boxes as much as possible so 700 very simply came from the fact that 1 in 700 babies are born with a cleft. Luckily smile train tracks donations so I can tell you we really kicked off actual fundraising on February 21st.  Support came from exactly where I thought it would and then shockingly, beautifully, unexpectedly from so so many other places and people. I can't even type is without tearing up. I look through that donor list and cry. The happiest most grateful tears.  Ok so ready? In 6 months we raised.....  

$13,827.15 from 49 huge hearted donors

what does that mean?

55 surgeries


Fifty five you guys. 55 kiddos that are getting surgery because of you 49 amazing people. What?!

WHAAAAAT? You guys that's surgeries. I wish this wasn't about money. I wish I could hug all of these moms and dads and tell them why it's going to be ok. I wish that's what I could collect, donations of hugs. But here's the thing.  I had oh so many feelings and fears around surgery but I did not have to ever worry that we couldn't afford it. I sometimes would lay awake at night and wonder if surgery was the right thing. What if something went terribly wrong and surgery was the wrong choice. But I never had to worry if surgery was an attainable option for us. Thanks to insurance that was never a question. Not only was it not a question but surgery at the best childrens hospital in our country was covered. Honestly, almost no questions asked. Nick made me ask lots of questions because he couldn't believe it, but yes it was true. Truthfully the whole thing consumed me and again, I didn't need to worry about the cost. The weight of a mothers heart and worry is so damn heavy. There's no words. Truly. So the fact that in these short months we've taken that burden off of 55 people. I don't really think there are words for that. So I WILL stop trying!

I absolutely hate to ask for help. I know exactly where this comes from but I've psychoanalyzed myself enough in this post ok? So I'm lucky enough to know so many business bosses locally and to have a fundraiser I had to reach out to them and ask for their help and support. But I did and we've got my favorite restaurant donating 20% and over 30 fabulous auction items. So mark your calendar, fast for the day and come eat allllllll the yummy things with us ok?